So the boy I've liked for . . . 6. . . 7. . .  yeah, 7 years asked me out today.  If you can't tell, I've been waiting for this for . . . forever, but. . .  the message he sent?  I'll let you read it and maybe you can tell me if you'd say yes:

It has been mentioned to me that you have had a crush on me in the past. I knew that it had been the case; I do not know whether it is still the case. I am the world's foremost expert on being senselessly rejected by girls who just can't see things my way. I realize now that I am being punished for being a hypocrite. I've said to myself on several occasions, "Even if she doesn't think she likes me, why can't she just grant me a single date to make my case?" Let me be bluntly honest - I know you are a great girl, but for whatever messed-up reasons, my feelings have not changed. However, far be it from me to deny you any longer that opportunity which I myself have been perhaps fortunate, but frustrated and angry, to have been denied by others. I am a selfish, arrogant jerk, and you are likely to end up even more devastated than before, but I won't guard you from that reality any longer. If you want one date, I will give you one date.

Yeah. . . I think I'm gonna say no.  Anyone who reads this. . . Please tell me what you think